Lenny Bruce 1963 by Martin Konopacki
The Pot Smokers by Lenny Bruce
The following is a pictorial and written thesis on the
dread narcotic, Cannabis sativa: also known - in the idiom of those poor
souls who are involved with this living death - as pot, grass, mota, yelba,
or the very clandestine "my friend," or "anything" over
the 'phone to avoid detection: "Did your friend get in yet?" or
"Did he get in yet?" or the vulgarity, "Is anything
happening?"
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Russell Dreck sat in his room in a hypnotic trance, unaware that the cobwebs in the plant his mother had given him for Easter had gotten out of hand. He sat there dejected, listless, pepless, and - the most tragic of all to a warped mind - potless.
He hadn't touched his baton for a week. His boots and tassels lay in the corner, unused. Hmm, he's wearing those sandals again that the beatnik gave him.
Russell's mother knew there was something wrong with
Russell. She and the seventeen year old had, up to now, been inseparable. His
indifference was a cold stab to his poor mother's heart, but a relief to his
father, who was damn lonesome.
One night, Russell wasn't listening to The Answer Man with his mother, as they had done for years. Mrs Dreck looked over at her husband, who was viciously breaking the foremast inside of Russell's ship-in-the-bottle. "I wonder where Russell is. It's time for The Answer Man; he'll be on in a minute," Mrs Dreck said bravely, biting back the tears. "Why don't you ask him? He knows all the goddamn answers." |
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What Happened To Russell?
Russell just tried it once, on a dare. "The man came
around the schoolyard" - an extremely esoteric bit of information,
because the real big pushers have spread around the fable, "Just ask any
jazz musician." Schoolyards are the place where most of the marijuana is
sold. In fact, a stranger can go into any town, into any schoolyard during
recess; and when the teacher says, "Do you want milk?" you reply,
"No." And then the man comes up and gives you a free marijuana.
That's why you see the whole classroom with the children's heads on their
desks, napping (idiom in the underworld: nodding).
Russell's mother decided to call he older son, Steve.
Although he was not as sensitive as Russell, he was lucky: he loved the
outdoors and could never fall prey to the tomb-like existence that befell his
brother. Steve loved the open country. His mother called him up in Oregon,
where he was selling shingles and siding. He not only liked to live outside,
but he liked to sell things that fit on the outside. (Some narrow-minded
authorities had put some of his friends on the inside, but that's another
book.)
Steve listened to his mother's impassioned tale of the
bearded beatnik and his bother's grapple with Satan. Steve went out to avenge
his brother. Steve was arrested several months later by local authorities,
upon the insistence of the B'nai B'rith, after breaking the jaws of two
Rabbis whom he mistook for beatniks. He discovered this too late when,
instead of spouting Kerouac, they screamed "Givalt!"
Steve could have been helped if his mother had known the terms that are part of the idiomatic fog that veils the user... |
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